The C-Section was scheduled for 12:00 at St. Francis. As we checked in at 10:00, the receptionist was waiting on us! From what I heard, the staff had been looking forward to delivering and caring for triplets. I went back immediately and got changed into my gown. I was absolutely scared to death. As a matter of fact, Matt took a video of me before we left the house that morning and, as he pointed the camera at my face, asked, "are you scared?" I can't watch that video without crying because I feel sorry for myself... choking up as I say that I'm very scared. I had mixed emotions...I was VERY uncomfortable and ready to get the babies out of my tummy... but was afraid of the surgery and probably more afraid of the unknown... how were we going to do this?! I didn't know how to take care of one baby, let alone three!
In the prep room, they hooked up my IV and I waited for 12:00. As I waited, I meditated over scripture, trying to calm myself. Matt and I prayed and cried together a little... He didn't admit it until that moment, but he was as scared as I was. I think reality had finally hit. They wheeled me back by myself, saying Matt couldn't be in the room for the spinal block (which is very strange in my opinion... he can be in there for the surgery, but not the big shot in my back?) Anyway, it took a good long time to get the spinal block... it was very hard for me to sit on the side of the bed and hunch over my enormous belly. The nurse kept asking me, does it feel like it's on your spine, to the left or to the right? Very hard to tell, by the way, and making me more nervous by the minute! After what seemed like an eternity, I was moved to the table and felt my legs getting numb. I had made up my mind I was going to try to disconnect myself from the surgery and didn't want to know when they were cutting, etc. because I was terrified of being awake while they were cutting me open and had their hands inside me!! I guess they had already started and hadn't gone to get Matt yet. Even though they didn't give me anything to calm my mind, it feels like a dream... don't know if that was the spinal block effecting me, or God delivering me from my fear. Maybe a little of both!
Matt told me they went back to get him, and when they told him they already started, he took off as fast as he could to get there. He said when he got there, I was already cut open. He talked to me, but kept looking at what was going on over the sheet. For anyone that doesn't know, they put up a curtain over your chest, so you can't see what's going on. Matt kept peeking around the curtain, though I didn't want him to. I was scared to death he would pass out and leave me there alone! But, he didn't pass out and seemed very interested in what was going on. He said they had my stomach skin pulled all the way up to my chest and my shoulders and head were jerking around a lot as they moved me on the table. Tears just rolled down my eyes the whole time.
As they brought out the first baby, Izzy, we heard her cry and Matt and I both started laughing and crying. He kept telling me how beautiful she was. I've never been more in love with him than at that moment. He looked so happy and in awe of what was happening. They whisked Izzy off without me seeing her, then, less than a minute later, came Abby. As she was born, she let out her scream and peed on the doctors! Matt said, "She has tons of black hair", then made a joke about her looking like the UPS man. The Doctor chuckled under his mask, but kept working. Less than a minute after Abby, Ally was born. Ally had swallowed some fluid while she was waiting to be born, so she needed oxygen right away. They took all 3 babies back to a room close by and asked if Matt wanted to go with them. He looked at me like, "Can I?" (I had asked that he not leave me... but by that time, both our priorities had changed.) "Go! I'm fine", I said. The nurse talked to me the rest of the time, asking me about the girls' names, etc. and helped me to get through those final moments. Though they were still working on me, the girls needed to get back to the NICU, so they brought each baby to me to kiss on the cheek. They all looked the same from the angle I was at, and all were bundled with only their little faces showing.
Matt ran out to the lobby to let the families know how everything had gone. When he got out to the lobby, he broke down crying and said, "We have three healthy little girls!" Everyone told me how sweet he was, hugging his parents and crying. (Like I said, I think it all sank in within about a 3 hour time frame for him). When they wheeled me back into the original prep room, I felt better IMMEDIATELY! I had no idea how uncomfortable I had gotten having 3 babies in my tummy. A huge weight (literally) had been lifted! Although I had the girls at noon, I was unable to see them until about 10:00 at night since I had a C-Section and they were in the NICU. If the babies are in the NICU, they can't take them out, and if you have a C-Section, they won't let you get out of bed until you can move your legs. As a matter of fact, I had to manipulate the system just to get to see them when I did. The nurses wouldn't let me, but I convinced my Dr. I was ok and got into a wheel chair to go see them. While I was in the NICU, I was sweaty, pastey and vomited into a cup, but I got to see and hold my little girls.
Here are a few pictures of that day:
Matt in prep room
Me in prep room
Poor little Ally
Abby
Abby
Izzy
Izzy
I LOVE birth stories! My story was very similar - especially the part about your husband!
ReplyDeleteKami,
ReplyDeleteAs I let the tears roll down my cheeks, I think back to when I first met you. What were you, twelve or so? I fell in love with you then and have always believed you are a truly special person. I'll say it over and over...no one could be a better mother to those girls than you. Thank you, thank you, thank you for blogging about your family.
Love,
Jan